Notes for 05/17/25
Examined life, Banning cell phones, Data visualization Enlightened witness, Being stupid, Loving people, Moral compass
Examined life - Back in the old days we sometimes called this unburdening "ventilation." Ventilation is getting things off your chest and clearing your conscience. Do people still have a conscience? Having been brought up Roman Catholic at age seven when we made our first holy communion we had our first confession and were taught that prior to confession we were to "examine our conscience" to determine what sins we should confess in order to attain absolution. I don't know if children are taught these concepts and practices any more. I think probably not. That's too bad because these practices develop skills that contribute to the development of virtuous character. These practices have been incorporated into Twelve Step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous. Do you examine your conscience regularly? Socrates said that an unexamined life is not worth living. Wouldn't this be a better world if people regularly examined their life and their conscience and told someone of their findings? (David G. Markham post to Clinicians’ Exchange on 05/16/25)
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New York joins other states in banning cell phone use in schools - On May 14, Alabama Gov. Kay Ivey (R) signed House Bill 166, banning cellphone use in K-12 schools starting in the 2025-2026 school year. This move makes the Yellowhammer State the fourth state to ban cellphone use in schools in May alone:
On May 5, Oklahoma Gov. Kevin Stitt (R) signed Senate Bill 139, which institutes a year-long ban on cellphone use in schools and requires school districts to implement policies to enforce it.
On May 6, New York Gov. Kathy Hochul (D) announced a school cellphone ban policy as part of the state budget for fiscal year 2026.
On May 9, Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp (R) signed House Bill 340, banning cellphone use in elementary and middle schools starting in January 2026.
All those state policies prohibit unsanctioned cellphone usage throughout the school day. Each state's policy exempts school-issued or school-used devices and has exemptions for students with medical or academic needs requiring the use of a wireless device. The Oklahoma and New York policies require a means for parents to contact students in an emergency.
The banning of cell phones in schools has important ramifications for young people learning how to pay attention to important things rather than compulsively seeking the next dopamine hit from their electronic device to which they have become addicted. I am hearing in the counseling office about the withdrawal that students and parents are experiencing. The cravings are a significant source of distress. I was talking with a college professor on Tuesday about banning cell phones and lap tops and tablets in his classroom. He hasn’t done it so far but notices the distracted students when he is teaching. (David G. Markham posting to davidgmarkham.substack.com on 05/16/25)
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Data visualization, charts that changed the world - Here is a fascinating 6 minute YouTube video about data visualization in the form of pie charts, dot charts, bar charts that have changed the world. Data visualization hasn’t been around that long, only since the mid nineteenth century. The video is worth watching and thinking about. How often do you use charts both as a viewer and as a creator?
(David G. Markham posting to davidgmarkham.substack.com on 05/16/25)
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Enlightened witness - Alice Miller wrote in her book The Drama Of The Gifted Child that what abused people need is an enlightened witness. The enlightened witness acts as an agent of demystification and provides the validation for the person being gaslit that they are not crazy. This is a very important function of a psychotherapist and often the reason that people seek therapy even when they are not consciously aware that this is what they are searching for. (David G, Markham in email to colleague on 05/17/25)
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Loving people in the flesh - “It is easy to love people in memory; the hard thing is to love them when they are there in front of you.”
— John Updike (1932–2009)
~ Follow-up Question:
To what extent does the human tendency to idealize others in their absence reveal a deeper discomfort with the unpredictability and imperfection of real, embodied relationships, and how might this preference for memory over presence shape our understanding of authenticity in love? (From The Wisdom Letter #278)
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Being stupid - “A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep.”
— Saul Bellow (1915–2005)
~ Follow-up Question:
Can the conscious choice to ignore truth in favor of comforting illusion be morally justified, and what are the ethical implications of prioritizing emotional or ideological security over intellectual honesty in both personal and collective life? (From The Wisdom Letter #278)
In psychology this investment in ignorance is called “denial” and sometimes “resistance.” It is a very common dynamic when people are resisting change which is being called for. The call for a new reality creates cognitive dissonance which is very anxiety inducing and leads to all kinds of acting out behaviors to relieve the distress. When people tell me they are dealing with anxiety I usually ask “What are you afraid of?”
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The conscience and moral compass - I think that Freud called the "conscience" the superego.
Super ego can mean many things such as living up to one's own standards and moral expectations and/or the expectations of others.
In our postmodern world where anything goes and anyone's "truth" is as good as anyone else's, we have lost a consensus about an appropriate moral compass.
George W. Bush's Advisor, Karl Rove, said that truth is whatever power says it is.
Kellyanne Conway said in the first Trump Administration that they dealt in "alternative facts."
Ken Wilber described our postmodern world as an age of "narcissistic nihilism."
So without any agreed upon moral compass to guide our decision making between right and wrong what are we to do but wander in confusion, anxiety, demoralization, and engage in activities that hasten our demise as a species? That's where we as psychotherapists come in. We help clients not only with symptom reduction and even elimination, but finding a good way to live that works for them. (David G. Markham posting to Clinicians’ Exchange on 05/17/25)
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